Have you given your legacy any thought? Do you want to leave money to a favorite non-profit or educational foundation? Do you want to make life easier for your children and grandchildren or perhaps help them with higher education or debts? Perhaps your legacy may not be monetary, so you are giving thought to other ways you want to be remembered.
My Story
Last year my oldest son gave me a gift for my birthday that turned out to be not only a gift to me, but a special gift for him, his brother, for their children, and hopefully for their grandchildren. Every week over the course of a year I was sent a question about myself and my life. I had the option of writing an answer to that question or making up a different question. My son saw every response and any pictures I posted to add impact to my story.
This was so fun! I got to share stories I had not thought about for years. Some of my favorite questions covered the following topics:
- My birth
- My first job
- My faith
- My siblings
- My definition of love
- My life goals
When my year was up, I reviewed all my answers, added a few more questions and pictures, and sent the package to be composed into a book. I love my book!
This project was especially important to me because I want my grandchildren to have a sense of who their grandmother is as a girl, mother, wife, and professional. I realize and am sad that I did not ask my parents more about their lives. Although they shared some stories, I feel like I really did not know them well except in their role as my mother and father.
Even sadder to me is that I did not know three of my grandparents at all. They were deceased before I was born. I have memories of my maternal grandfather, however, and they are precious. I would have especially loved to hear stories about my grandmothers. I know one of my grandmothers owned several farms. I have lots of questions about that – everything from her role in running the farms to how, or if, it affected her marriage.
My gift was through a company called Storyworth, but you do not need a special program to come up with stories about your life. You can do this yourself. Several Sixty and Me articles discuss journaling, for example.
My Next Book
Now that my memories book is in print, I am thinking about a second book with answers to other questions that I think are important for my children and grandchildren to know:
- Why did I choose to work outside the home?
- Was I ever discriminated against as a woman?
- What was my favorite job? My least favorite? Why?
- What was the hardest adjustment as a newlywed?
- What was the hardest adjustment when I divorced?
- What did I learn about myself as a single adult?
It is my opinion that the more we know about a person, the better we understand what drives their choices. That can lead to increased respect, honor, and even love.
Other Options
Not everyone likes to write just as not everyone will be able to leave assets to their heirs, but we certainly can leave something. Perhaps, if you have the equipment, you could create an audio recording. If you have a smartphone, video and audio recording is quite easy.
As my mother was failing and we were closing out her apartment, she would tell us stories about some of the things that were special to her, especially her jewelry. She has been gone for many years but objects that previously had no meaning now sometimes bring tears and other times smiles. As I put one of her bracelets on my arm, I remember her story and say a silent, “thank you” and blow her a kiss!
Whatever method you choose, please pass along the stories that make you unique and I guarantee they will bring joy to your family for generations.
Beverly J Bowers, CFP®
